I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
my poor anus
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
