there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
