dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
