I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Randomize
