This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
do herpes really smell.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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