I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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