It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
A+ Viking dick
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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