The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
