shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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