We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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