3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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