she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
