You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
