Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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