it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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