This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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