she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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