yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
