...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
