ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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