Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm determined to sit on that face.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
