so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
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