I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
