im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
