You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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