Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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