R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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