no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
