The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
