we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Randomize
