I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
