i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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