i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
zippers are such a cool invention
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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