My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
