You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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