so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.