Whod you bang
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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