that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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