its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
