As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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