Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
