He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
A+ Viking dick
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
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