I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize