i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize