Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize