Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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