Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Are we still banned from the library?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
