Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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