Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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