We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
