U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I want you more than these girls want KFC
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
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