We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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