She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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